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Sunday, July 28, 2013

A Handful Of Things I Thought You'd Want to Know and Probably More That You Didn't

In the fine tradition of chatting it up about one's self and all the narcissism I could muster, I thought I'd tell you all about me.  These thoughts are in no particular order but are rather random as they pop into my head....here goes...

1.  I detest British television....I know..many of you love Downton Abbey and the like but I tend to prefer non thinking television more the likes of TMZ.

2.  I'm noticing more and more people are walking past me in the sunrise of my 43rd year saying things like  "Hey ! smile! don't be sad !  or Smile...you're beautiful !"  Hey, don't get me wrong it's fun to be told you're beautiful...I just get the sneaking suspicion these comments are more because my eyelids are starting to sag and my cheeks do kind of a bulldog thing.  So, if you see me and I look like a crabby and sad, I'm just needing a little lift and tuck.  I'm a decently happy person except for when I'm not but that's another post....

3.  I have a secret longing for a tattoo, I have actually been wanting one for close to 20 years, I used to want Wonder Woman but now I don't, I really don't know what I would actually choose If I ever did get one, it seems like such an important decision, so final and scary....I know it's not but I really get worked up over stuff like that.

4.  I lived in Puerto Rico for a year when I was 5, then went on to live in a Mexican neighborhood til I was 15.  I spoke spanish until I was 11 but now its a trick to remember what to say, but I still understand most of it...

5.  Celebrity sightings? yeah, I've had a couple.....I once saw Tiger Woods in the lobby of a hotel and couldn't resist going up to him and asking if I could shake his hand ( this was before he was a nasty bird)... he called me "maam" twice...sigh....refer back to #2....sighting #2  I once went to a Menudo press conference and concert when I was 13.  My friend's dad was a photographer and was able to get us in on all the action.

6.  Hanging clothes up outside to dry then bringing them into wear sometimes give me the willies and gives me  itchy spots and imaginations that they'res some random ant crawling up my back.....


well thats all i can think of for now....hope this has somehow added to your reading satisfaction :)

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Tales From A Country Road

     I'm a city girl by nature.  For the greater part of my childhood we lived in a little mexican neighborhood.  On the weekends, the street vendors were abundantly scattered throughout the main roads.  You could find on any given corner someone selling the greatest mexican snacks you could ask for.  There were palletas (mexican popsicles) in every kind of flavor you could think of.   People had little rolling carts with Elotes (corn on the cob) smothered in butter and cheese and chili powder.  I could go on forever.  As a kid, we would hop on the city bus and head to the downtown beach were we hung out all day.  We would be burnt to a crisp while my ma would cake on the noxema....really? noxema?...no sunscreen just stinky white cream after the burn fest...well, it was the 70's.

     Later years moved me into the suburbs, less congested but still close to everything.  My move to the suburbs is where my love for Big Daddy began.  After years of married life, our lives took us further and further from the city limits to the place I now call home.  I have called the country my home for over 10 years now.  I have grown to love it, although I wasn't sure if I ever would.  I love the quietness and the roaming space.  I love my clothesline and watching everything wave in the breeze.  I don't like to actually hang the laundry, but the kids are pretty good at it, so I'll just watch them hang it :)  We've recently got a couple of good rains so I've been watching the same load dry for about 2 days.  The "grannies" blowing around on the line are making me self conscious, thank God only my clan has shared my view out the back window. 

     Here we are, the real reason for this post.  As you have previously read, I would consider myself  a pretty well adjusted country girl.  (Side note.....Big Daddy got a cowboy hat last summer....that awakened feelings in me I didnt know existed....wait did I just write that?  anyhoo,  girls...if your man doesnt already have a cowboy hat, I suggest you run right out and get one).   Ok,  where was I?  So, Im driving down my country road minding my own business and  I run over something in the road.  It wasnt an animal or bird as you might suspect although I have been known to go into a mild depression after hitting birds and once a racoon.  It was small, and  wait.....was that a knife?!   I circle around to check thinking of the new tires I just got in the winter and think "oh great !  then.....oh hey, I'll give it to Big Daddy, he'll love it".   Yup, it was an OPEN pocketknife,  my imagination kicks in.   Why was there a knife in the middle of the road?!  Did someone unknowingly drop it or was it part of a bigger scheme?!  My mind races,  so I did what any illogical person would do who has watched one to many crime dramas....I called the police.  Yes, I know what your'e thinking...My man thought the same thing as he just shook his head in embarrasement.  The dispatcher assured me that someone must have dropped it and its ok to just throw it away...ok, tragedy averted, my mind is again at ease.

     I never did tell you about the box turtle that wanted to fight me on the road.  Yesterday, we're driving down yet another country road and I pass a turtle in the road.  We were excited and then nervous because of impending doom if an unsuspecting car sent this little dude to his maker.  Do I keep driving?  No way!  I pull over, tell the kids to stay in the car, and approach the turtle to pick him up, show the kids then carefully put him in the grass.  Now before you start to worry, be assured that there were no other cars around at the time so all was good.  As I get closer to the turtle he begins to run,  yes, you read right...run.  Then he began to hiss...I should have stopped chasing him but I didnt and I barely could touch him as he escaped my grasp.  How sad that a turtle whooped my rear end in a race.  I hang my head low in defeat as I get back in the car and drive away .  Now, just to find some hand sanitizer........

    

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Aging Gracefully...(Subtitled....Embracing Gravity)

     Lately I read a quote from a very admired lady that said something like, " I believe happy girls are the prettiest girls ".  Which thrilled me for about a half a second.  At first I was all, " According to Ms. Hepburn, I am extremely wonderful to look upon ! "  because I'm a pretty happy person as happy goes, well, except when I'm not ....oh yeah, then there's those couple days a month when  I walk the hormonal tightrope.  That delicate balance between tyranny and tears....I'll save that for a later post.

     What does gravity have to do with aging you might wonder to yourself.  I appreciate gravity as much as the next person.  I enjoy not floating away without notice. Gravity is  fantastic, just not when it comes to the aging process.  So how does one age gracefully aside from the obvious fixes like nips, tucks creams, serums and sit ups?  The Good Book tells us that our beauty is not just in our appearance but in our inner beauty that is of great value in God's sight.  That is not to say we let the outside go to pot, we just gotta remember to "groom" the inside.  Let's take time to care for our hearts and our minds. 

     My goal is to nourish my inside and work on my outside.  Being comfortable in my own skin instead of wishing it looked like someone else's.   Being  less critical of the flaws and not resentful of  "gravity".   I have noticed at the times I feel my worst is when I'm most annoyed with other people.  When I feel all is well with my soul, those are the moments I find it easiest to forgive and care for the folks around me.  Anyway, I say all that to say,  I guess I do agree that happy girls are the prettiest girls.......

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

All Things Potty

     There is a straw that will break the camels back.  That proverbial straw in my case is the public toilet.  I never thought public restrooms would become such an important part of my life.  It seems I barely gave them a second thought until about my 7th month of pregnancy.  This, I think, may be actually my third post about restrooms, I suppose I might be obsessed.  Maybe, obsessed is too strong of a word....I'll leave that up to you.

     Lets go back to the beginning.  When I was huge with baby,  I became very aware of where the closest toilet was in all of my surroundings.  I could tell you without a doubt in which store you may find cleanliness and comfort.  My favorites were the ones where the walls in each stall reached to the ceiling like an impenetrable fortress. One where there was mood lighting and catchy music in which to sing along on a whim.  Later, my next favorites where the ones with the little sinks and changing tables in the big stalls.  I could drive my giant stroller into the spacious room of refuge and take care of my wailing, poopy baby in peace.

     Enough of the "nice" bathrooms, as they were far and few between.  One of my most fond memories was having to nurse my then infant daughter on the floor of the Kmart as she wailed and I clumsily tried to balance her on my knee as I leaned on the toilet, only to then resort to sitting on the floor as far away from the commode as possible.  It wasn't like now where you could pretty much whip out your "unmentionable" in public to feed your baby while people try not to stare.   I'll  never forget the store associate at my nearest department store telling me "You cant do that in here" as I tried to take care of my new son in their cafe.  I did report her but it didn't alter the world or anything.  Flash forward, potty training.  There's nothing quite like your toddler touching the toilet seat then grabbing at your face as you try to help them with their clothes, especially in the summer.

     Potty training is now behind us as we now have 3 graduated conductors of the potty train.  Now, the biggest challenge is the strong, exhortation to put paper on the seats, because they're full of germs and PLEASE, PLEASE  for the love of all that is holy...don't forget to wash your hands !!   You know the paper toilet protector is pretty much worthless in my opinion since it takes about 2 minutes to actually situate them on the seat.   Then, people like to "hover" .....well, great!  "hover" till your hearts content, but can you at least wipe up your sprinkles?!   Oh no.....by all means...make sure you leave them there so I can plop my giant heiny on them....TMI ?  yeah, probably....but wouldn't the world be a nicer place if everyone just sat their caboose down on the seat?.....well, maybe not....   I could go on forever...about the 1 ply toilet paper, the nasty wet sinks.....I will spare you......til next time ;)

    

    

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Now, where was I ?

 Wow, I cant even believe I haven't written anything in over a year.  I'm not a person that is given to speechlessness, so I must catch up.  Holy cow, what has happened in the last year?  My mustache is getting thicker and  my feet are getting bigger.  There's only a few more shoes sizes left, I hope this stops soon.  I guess I can keep plucking my mustache, what a price to pay for a smooth lip.

  In the last year, we have gained 2 hamsters, 1 bunny and are still loving our nearly 13 yr. old lab.  As much as he needs, he still warms my heart and brings me back to a place in my mind when we were both a little younger and our joints moved a little freer.  We said goodbye to our dear friend, Birdman after having him in our family for over 19 years. He was our feisty Moluccan Cockatoo with beautiful head feathers and a feather picked body.  He was our bargain pet, due to his nervous nature. Where most cockatoos can be sold for lots of money, ours, including his cage was only $50.  He loved big daddy more than anyone else and was the most loving and calm when around the man he loved.  (sounds like a serious love story, doesnt it?)

 The kids are getting huge and keep me on the edge of my seat on any given day.  We are still homeschooling, 5 yrs. in the making.  Being with the kids is not always Little House on the Prairie, as a matter of fact somedays its more like One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.  But, its pretty cool when I can get through math without tears....(talking about myself here).   Big Daddy......what can I say?......I love this guy with my entire being (yeah, I know....who likes love stories on public posts) I guess if I had a way to describe us...I would maybe say George Burns and Gracie Allen ( thats an overexaggeration, but, we do like to have fun).  We met at 17 and are sharing 40 something this year. 

  I never did get my basement organized...but it is always in the back of my mind, at least I havent lost complete sight of my goal....maybe when the kids are a little older I'll realize my lofty dream :)